Friday 15 November 2013

Week 38: Sleep training...again

We've moved into our new home almost a month now and your night-time sleep has been getting worse and worse. Early this week you were waking up every 2 hours at night and my usual tactic of feeding you to sleep was no longer working. I was exhausted and looked into booking a stay at the Tresilian to get some professional help to sleep train you. I made an appointment with the early childhood centre so that I could get a referral. A friend of mine had just been to Tresilian and said it had changed their lives, her daughter now sleeps through the night and goes down for long naps without any hassles. It sounded too good to be true! Alas, it seems lots of people need help with sleep-training and the waiting period is over a month. I had to do something now, especially as we just got a spot at daycare for you starting next Jan. I need you to be able to self-settle and be able to nap during the day without me being right next to you

So, the hard work started 2 nights ago. I read a book that promised sleep-training in 3 days...so I started following the instructions. I went through your usual routine and put you down in your crib rather than letting you fall asleep after your feed. Then I left the room. Previously I was staying in the room because I didn't want you to think I was abandoning you but that was obviously not working. Sometimes I was stuck in the room for over an hour shushing you and patting you until I got hungry for dinner and Daddy had to take over. This time, I shut the door and put the timer on. I counted down to 5 minutes while listening to the sounds of your cries. I had to learn to decipher when you were really upset (escalating cry) or if you were settling yourself into sleep (intermittent crying or woo-wooing). After 5 minutes, if you were still crying loudly, I had to knock loudly and slowly on the door for 30 seconds. Apparently the slow knocking was supposed to calm you down. When I went in after the first 5 minutes, you stopped crying. I didn't make any eye contact with you, just did the shushing sound and turned you to your back (you always rolled on to your tummy to do your wailing). Then I walked out the door and put the timer on for another 5 minutes. If possible, this 2nd time you cried even louder! I felt so bad listening to you crying. But I kept telling myself, you have to learn to self-settle. This will be good for you in the long-run. I had to stay strong!



So on this went, every 5 minutes check you and then walk out. Apparently the book said babies take about 35-45 minutes on the first night to fall asleep and usually that was out of exhaustion. If you didn't fall asleep by then, I could take you out of the room for a few minutes. But then I had to put you back. Well, I couldn't last to 35 minutes. By 25 minutes, I felt so bad I went to pick you up and took you to the lounge room. And you know what you did? You laughed and giggled. That reassured me that all the crying was not traumatising you. So back in the room again. Amazingly, after a couple of minutes of crying, you fell asleep. I thought there was something wrong with the baby monitor and went in to check. You were sleeping soundly. So first night, it took about 30 minutes for you to fall asleep on your own.

Second night, you knew what was coming and started crying before I even put you in your crib. My poor baby, I had to stay firm and we went through the routine again. This time, you fell asleep at 25 minutes.

Today I decided to do the same thing during your naps. So your morning nap, you cried for 15 minutes. And this afternoon, you cried hard for about 5 minutes and then I heard you doing the 'woo woo' sound so I didn't go in to check. You fell asleep after about 10 minutes. I think you are finally learning! Hopefully tonight you will fall asleep even more quickly than during the day. Fingers crossed.

You're still not sleeping through the night but I think you are waking up less often, at least for the first stretch. You've done so well with falling asleep on your own, I think it will be a matter of time before you learn to self-settle during the night when you wake up. We'll be moving you out of our room as soon as we get some blockout blinds for you room. Moving you into your own room will be hard for me because it gives me so much comfort to be able to just pop by head over your crib to check you're ok.

 Let's hope all this sleep training works!

Here's a photo of you and Aunty Mandy taking a nap yesterday...you were so tired after your first night of sleep training. Aunty Mandy had a good excuse too, she's been studying for her exams :)

-- 3rd night update --
Oh my. I put you in your crib and you cried your heart out until I left the room. I put the timer on and you cried for 30 seconds. That's 30 SECONDS. Then you went all quiet and I got worried so I stuck my head around the door to see what you were doing. You were just moving your head around drowsily. A minute later, you fell asleep. Wow! 3 nights of sleep training and as per the book, you fell asleep on your own. I'm happy. Next step, sleeping through the night... :)

-- 1 week update --
I wish I had sleep-trained you earlier! You're so good now. You go to sleep on your own during your day naps. I just put you in the crib and sometimes you whinge a bit while I'm in the room but you'll be quiet after I leave and when I check on you a bit later, you'll be fast asleep. I can do more during the day now rather than patting you to sleep! You sleep 1.5-2 hours now. It's wonderful.

You go to sleep easily at night too but still not sleeping through the night. Last night we decided to try putting you in your own room but you woke up at 10pm and cried/screamed a lot. I think you were disoriented with the new surroundings and didn't calm down until I picked you up. We'll try again soon.

3 comments:

nelisa said...

Amazing! Good work Mama! What book was it? At least you're equipped to deal with any future regression too.
Good Luck getting him to sleep through! It returns rest to mum and dad so the days are more fun!

lucas said...

Thanks Nelisa! It's a book called 'The gift of sleep - teach your child to sleep in 3 days'. I've got it as an e-book so can email to you if you want a copy?
We're still working on sleeping through the night....fingers crossed! :)

nelisa said...

Oh I thought I replied to this last night asking for the pdf but I guess in my half asleep-ness, it didn't post. Thanks for the pdf!

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